Granted, but you were crushed by a Chancey at the hospital shortly after birth.
I wish there was a legal and safe way to punch babies.
Granted, but it is legalized only after babies are outfitted with people-destroying lasers.
I wish I had some sort of VR interface to my computer.
Granted, but you die from radiowaves.
I wish I didn't have any homework,
Granted, but now all you can do is clean sewers for a living.
I wish Sabertooth would get himself a girlfriend so he could stop all that masturbating. :xp:
Granted, but he's too shy to get any so he keeps masturbating anyway. :xp:
I wish that this wish didn't backfire.
Granted, you wish won't, but I will.
I wish we could go back at Sabrez sexuality.
Granted, but Sabre now has a girlfriend - in fact, he has three.
I wish there were no Sexually Transmitted Diseases.
Granted, they now only appear in relationships in which the man has three girlfriends or more :xp:
(Double backfire!)
I wish I had a real functional lightsaber (and even a pink one would be cool enough!)
Granted, but you dropped it off a cliff 5 mins after getting it.
Now it's broke. :xp:
I wish I had some chicken.
Here ya go, but due to genetic engineering....it doesn't taste like chicken anymore.
I wish dead people would bathe more often.
Granted, but they use YOUR bathtub...
While YOU'RE in it...
I wish my mother loved me... :(
Granted, but now she loves you in a way that is forbidden and unnatural. :xp:
I wish I had the Midas touch, but only for inanimate objects.
Granted; however, it is for both animate and inamate objects. ;)
I wish that I had all of the html codes 'embeded' into my head.
Done, but embedded was taken literally as well. Your whole skin of your head is now full of codes, like one giant nerd-tatoo! :xp:
I wish for the Force Unleashed to hit the PC as well!
Granted. The game disc comes alive and breaks the PC with a baseball bat.
I wish to see what happens to me in a parallel universe version of Lucasforums.
Granted, but the latest upgrade on vbulletin erased that universe.
I wish I could use bigger signature images.
Granted, but RedHawke killed you...
I wish I had a drink...
Granted, but it's from the Kath Hounds' Watering Urn.
I wish I had a custom title...
Granted, but it says Veteran.
I wish my laptop had more memory.
Granted. It has more memory, but at the expense of your own life experiences.
I wish Raptor Jesus existed.
Granted, but he bites off your head.
I wish I didn't have just one week to catch up on late assignments.
Granted, but you have just one day to catch up on late assignments.
I wish there was a KotOR III being made...
Granted, but it will be released in 2050 on a platform obviously not yet in existence.
I wish KOTOR 3 were already out on PC (so that issue could finally be behind us).
Granted, but it's a direct port of the Commodore 64 version.
I wish that is what she said.
Granted but she's lying
I wish I wern't going to Freshman Farewell stag.
Granted, you failed every class you had this year and therefore will still be a freshman next year.
I wish water was flammable.
It is. I saw it on the Colbert Report.
Yeah, but that was on the April Fool's Day show.
I wish I could think of a wish right now.
Granted, but I already replied so you'll have to wait until you can post it.
I wish the Soup-Nazi from Seinfeld would be retconned into the Death Star Cantina!
He was, but he refused DV soup and was last seen floating through space.
I wish that things like those ultimate fighting matches were death matches.
Granted, buy your match against an extremely powerfull martial artist El Ertisto de lг Murete (Artist of Death, I believe?) will be the first to air!
I wish I was of royal blood!
Granted, you now have hemophilia.
I wish I was in Spain right nao.
Granted...you are on a very nice camping in Spain near a forest. *Forest fire FWOOOOOSH*
I wish I could trace my family tree further back...it only goes to 1580 :(
Granted, you discover that your ancestors were dropped down by aliens. You don't get their superpowers and the FBI knows too.
I wish I had your soul. Muahahaha!
Granted, but my soul is rotten by alcohol abuse, beiing Dutch, too much Monty Python, Star Wars and extreme exposure to Lucasforums. You die of extreme exposure to my soul and spontaniously conbust.
I wish I had my soul back! :xp:
After Hal's unforseen demise, you now do. However, it now claims you life as well, as in a suicidal fit you knock me out and face El Ertisto de lã Murete in my place.
I wish this forum had even more options than the recent upgrade allowed for.
Granted. However, half your user_name gets taken away as a result.
I wish I could change shape and form.
Granted, but you can only change into a Snorlax.
I wish I had triscuts.
Granted, they're the new cyanide flavoured ones.
I wish I could shard your purplez IRL.
Decides not to grant wish, just for the helluva it.
I wish Bill Gates liquidated all his stock and gave me the money for my own.
Granted, but due to technical difficulty, the economy begins to drop even further and you begin to owe the government twice the amount you received from Microsoft.
I wish I knew what I was even talking about......
Granted, but you forget it a moment later.
I wish my internet connection speed was fifteen times faster.
Granted, but it only moves 15x faster than partially frozen molasses.
I wish I had a fully stocked complimentary wet bar at my disposal.
Granted, but the idiots who went to place it misunderstood the wish and disposed of the thing immediately.
I wish I had Uber soccer skills :)
Granted. Soccer is all you ever think about now. Say goodbye to oral hygiene, food, family, friends, school, etc.
I wish there was a cure to end all suffering without having to die or some such.
Unfortunately, there isn't.
I wish I owned all the diamonds in the world.
Granted, but people now realise how useless they are.
I wish my wisdom teeth weren't removed today. >_<
Granted, all of your other teeth are pulled.
I remember something exactly liek this on another site, the 'Corrupt-a-Wish' thread...
I wish for KOTOR III to come out now and be the best game ever.
Granted, it's now released for the Atari 2600 and even the Angry videogame Nerd thinks it's good.
I wish I didn't have to work in a few hours....
Granted, but you get fired for not showing up.
I wish I hadn't registered for LucasForums.