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machievelli

Latest Posts

Page: 67 of 76
Posted in: Star Wars: Republic Dawn
  machievelli
04-20-2006, 8:17 PM
#2
Confrontation Breia Solo wasn’t sure what was the biggest mistake. Coming home, staying more than a few days, or... Becoming a Jedi Monk. Breakfast was always the worse. Mother would not have left for her office yet, Father was working at home, a...  [Read More]
Posted in: Star Wars: Republic Dawn
  machievelli
04-20-2006, 4:57 PM
#1
I finished the Beginning. I knew I could go farther, but face it people would you rather buy three books of about 300 pages each which will last years, or one monster 1000+page opus that you have to be careful reading to spare the spine? But even...  [Read More]
Posted in: [Fic] Star Wars:The Beginning.
  machievelli
04-20-2006, 11:32 PM
#121
As an American in my 50s, I'm not really comfortable with metric. I use it all the time (In fact one of my jobs when I edit is conversion) plus the fact that while Europeans use the Centimeters instead of millimeters, most military ordinance, especia...  [Read More]
Posted in: [Fic] Star Wars:The Beginning.
  machievelli
04-20-2006, 11:50 AM
#118
for those of you who have read it from the start, this is 225 pages long. It is a full book, in other words. With editing it will come out to just about 250. I'd have to start an entirely different thread, because as Mozart said about music 'you pu...  [Read More]
Posted in: [Fic] Star Wars:The Beginning.
  machievelli
04-20-2006, 2:19 AM
#116
Better yet, I'll just give it to you. Loss and gain Breia moved toward the table. The figure didn’t move. She reached down, running her hands across the forehead. “Oh Sanji.” she whispered. “Stop playing with my Lekku unless you mean it....  [Read More]
Posted in: [Fic] Star Wars:The Beginning.
  machievelli
04-19-2006, 11:35 PM
#114
Want a hint? Or do you want to wait for it?...  [Read More]
Posted in: [Fic] Star Wars:The Beginning.
  machievelli
04-19-2006, 12:35 PM
#112
So am I correct in understanding Breia made two cuts? The first cut off part of his hand that held the pistol and the second cut off three fingers of his hand that was holding onto her robe. The first time I read this I got the image that she threw t...  [Read More]
Posted in: [Fic] Star Wars:The Beginning.
  machievelli
04-19-2006, 2:39 AM
#109
Cover up “Sir! Two pirate vessels are approaching!” The sensor officer aboard Duroc painted the targets red. “Stand down!” Antilles roared. He turned toward the sensor officer. “Stand down, Mr. Queek.” “But sir, they attacked the Tok...  [Read More]
Posted in: [Fic] Star Wars:The Beginning.
  machievelli
04-18-2006, 10:41 AM
#107
Hey! This could become machievelli's trademark. Any story he writes would have at least one encounter with excrement, heh-heh-heh. ;) Wonderful detail with the weapon descriptions. Some of it I didn't really understand though. And I enjoy how you've...  [Read More]
Posted in: [Fic] Star Wars:The Beginning.
  machievelli
04-18-2006, 10:29 AM
#106
Hey! This could become machievelli's trademark. Any story he writes would have at least one encounter with excrement, heh-heh-heh. ;) Wonderful detail with the weapon descriptions. Some of it I didn't really understand though. And I enjoy how you've...  [Read More]
Posted in: [Fic] Star Wars:The Beginning.
  machievelli
04-18-2006, 10:22 AM
#105
Love the battle scenes, love imagining just what Breia's going to do next, love the kids wreaking havoc throughout the ship as the crew can only react. Using the crates as a countermeasure was a nice touch. Good to know the missiles weren't heat seak...  [Read More]
Posted in: [Fic] Star Wars:The Beginning.
  machievelli
04-18-2006, 10:11 AM
#104
Wow Mach, these last three chapters left me breathless! I can't wait to see how you resolve this mess. The beam cutters remind me of lightsabers, any significance? Keep up the great work. Actually there is not. The short beams use a monomolecular th...  [Read More]
Posted in: [Fic] Star Wars:The Beginning.
  machievelli
04-18-2006, 10:00 AM
#103
Heh, nice plot twists. I love it. The dress description was cool. I might have found a different euphemism ('crotch' just was a little too jarring--the word itself doesn't bug me, it was just its juxtaposition with such a lovely dress description),...  [Read More]
Posted in: [Fic] Star Wars:The Beginning.
  machievelli
04-17-2006, 11:12 PM
#99
When in danger when in doubt... “Shut off those damn alarms!” Captain Magtyar roared. He loosened the buttons of his uniform, then with a curse he ripped the tunic off. “Report!” Janos Tor at the security panel started talking immediately....  [Read More]
Posted in: [Fic] Star Wars:The Beginning.
  machievelli
04-17-2006, 4:02 PM
#98
That's OK, I need some breathing room to catch up on reading all the other stuff your prolific mind has created in the last week. I was beginning to wonder if you even slept anymore, you'd written so much. :D Sleep... That's laying down with your e...  [Read More]
Posted in: [Fic] Star Wars:The Beginning.
  machievelli
04-17-2006, 3:45 PM
#96
I had a quote in the next section from a pair of writers I like; 'There are only three kinds of luck, blind, dumb, and bad'. My computer hiccuped and ten pages that was supposed to be here went bye-bye. So I'll have to do them again....  [Read More]
Posted in: [Fic] Star Wars:The Beginning.
  machievelli
04-15-2006, 8:44 PM
#93
Youthful exuberance “Well now that the details are settled, would you like an aperitif?” Sunrider asked. Daysah stared at him. “You two have already planned to reprogram me like a new droid one second and the next asking if I want a drink?”...  [Read More]
Posted in: [Fic] Star Wars:The Beginning.
  machievelli
04-15-2006, 11:56 AM
#92
To quote Bette Davis in one of her movies 'Fasten your seat belts it's going to be a bumpy trip'...  [Read More]
Posted in: The Critic's 2 cents
  machievelli
04-20-2006, 12:31 AM
#263
Hi I'm kind of new here and I've just started on my first thread, would you please review it as soon as possible, thanks. :box1: I will tell you what I tell everyone, kid. I started at the first post chronologically, and have been working forward. I...  [Read More]
Posted in: The Critic's 2 cents
  machievelli
04-15-2006, 1:03 PM
#261
Nah....  [Read More]
Posted in: The Critic's 2 cents
  machievelli
04-15-2006, 1:43 AM
#259
^I was only referring to the Ithorian thing, they're just wierd.... The Ithorians are the galaxy's top geneticists after the Kamino...  [Read More]
Posted in: (fic) KOTOR excerpts
  machievelli
04-17-2006, 10:31 AM
#63
The Quest We arrived at the Enclave, and filed our report. As we went back toward the ship, a woman stopped us. “I am looking for Bastila Shan.” She said, looking at each of us. “I am she.” Bastila replied. The woman looked at Bastila, as...  [Read More]
Posted in: (fic) KOTOR excerpts
  machievelli
04-17-2006, 10:15 AM
#62
When I played the game the first time, I didn't have any Ion grenades at this point, and while the game required you to reach the computer terminal, it didn't require you to destroy the droids. So after fighting both of them four times and failing (I...  [Read More]
Posted in: (fic) KOTOR excerpts
  machievelli
04-17-2006, 2:16 AM
#60
Ascension The Council awaited me as they always had, united. Bastila looked at me, and for a moment I noticed unease in her face. Master Vrook, looking a little less angry than was his wont nodded at my entry, and took my hand. “I must congratulat...  [Read More]
Posted in: (fic) KOTOR excerpts
  machievelli
04-17-2006, 1:54 AM
#59
I verified in the KotOR game files that the name of the Jedi Master that Juhani struck down is Quatra, not Quarta. Thought you might like to know. :) A neat tweak to the story, having Mission hacking into Davik Kang's bank accounts and withdrawing a...  [Read More]
Page: 67 of 76