Its supposed to be possible(by what the canon story is) to have the Handmaiden in your party, when playing as a female. What options they intended to make this possible, I can't say.
There is a mod that made this possible(see it
here:
http://knightsoftheoldrepublic.filefront.com/file/Handmaiden_Choice_for_Females;41143), though it isn't compatible with TSLRCM. Having her in the party as a female would inevitably allow you to spar with her, basically following the same path as a male pc would. I don't know if they intended for more options beyond that(more akin to the options in the first game), though I'd imagine it would gone over just as well as the thing with Juhani and Belaya, if there were.