hit me about the mistakes, I want to improve on them
*Hits Revanscool so he doesn't do any more mistakes*
I like the idea and liked the chapter. Now Revan rescues her, they escape, go to Coruscant, and have a war that lasts atleast 10 chapters. Want to see more.
*Hits Revanscool so he doesn't do any more mistakes*
I like the idea and liked the chapter. Now Revan rescues her, they escape, go to Coruscant, and have a war that lasts atleast 10 chapters. Want to see more.
heh heh, what I meant was tell me all of them. But thanks anyway.
"Jaden, Carth!" called Visas "Revan has left Malachor."
"That sure was fast! He must've not encountered the hell after all." answered Jaden.
"He cut it off from the Force, therefore killing it." explained Visas.
"It would've taken three Jedi to cut me off from the Force, and it takes a Jedi as strong as Revan to drain the one's who even tried." Jaden thought out loud.
"She didn't kill Vrook, wasn't strong enough for him." told Visas.
"Who gives a damn now?" asked Carth impatiently "Get the rest of the Jedi and we can start tracking Revan."
"Yes. Our apprentices have finished their training, they're fully fledged Jedi Knights now." Jaden walked over to the microphone to call the other Jedi to the hangar "Brianna, Atton, Mira, Mical, Dustil, Mikel, Emily, Zak, Jill, Jean, James, Logan, Vrook, Vandar." he called. All ran to the hangar to find Jaden. "We're going to find Revan, we owe him. He banded us as one, it's the least we can do."
"He defied us one to many times." told Vrook "We shouldn't help him."
"Whoever's with us, come, if not... Don't follow." ordered Jaden.
Everyone but Vrook went to go assist Revan. "Watch the acadamy." told Jaden.
"Whatever happens, stay with me. I'll protect you." James told to Jean. Jean kissed James.
The Ebon Hawk landed on Mustafar. "Statement: HK-47 is ready to KILL!"
"No you're not."
"Qu-"
"No, HK! I am going alone. This matter is personal."
"Irritated answer: Acknowledged."
"Good."
"Master, Revan has landed on Mustafar." told Plagueis.
"Good. Kill her." ordered Malus.
Revan ran through the lava refineries rooms and chambers frantically in search for his loved one, screaming "BASTILA! BASTILA!" Revan sensed that she was in greater danger every step he took. Revan paused his search for a while and tried to track her using the Force. He then knew the exact way to go. He followed more corridors and shortcuts through rooms. He sensed the Dark Side getting closer to her. In Bastila's prison chamber, a Sith Marauder came through the door and put a lightsaber to her belly. Bastila shut her eyes, bit her lip and prepared for the worst. To her surprise, the stab was inaccurate. To her surprise, her right chain was cut. To her surprise, the door was at the other end of the room. When the door fell, she saw crushed bones, a flattende fixture, blood and guts everywhere. Malus saw through a video camera, his assassin's failiure. He was angred and pushed a button on his desk. Revan walked into the room, the first thing he started looking for was: Bastila. Revan immediately ran over to Bastila to get the other chain cut. But when he was almost there, there were many bolts of electricity. Malus had one more trick up his sleeve for eroding Revan's will. Revan heard his wife's frantic cry for help. He looked around to see what he could do. Revan ingited his sabers and started walking into the electric field. He was unharmed, for his sabers absorbed the bolts. Revan cut Bastila's left chain and carried her out to safety. He put his finger on her neck to find a pulse. He found none. Revan stationed his hand over Bastila and began using Force Heal. Revan could feel her heart beating, but very slow and she wasn't breathing. Revan panicked and began performing CPR. "One-two-three-four-five-six-seven-eight-nine-ten." Revan said as he started pushing on her chest to get the air flowing. Revan began the mouth to mouth step. He began blowing air into her. To his surprise, her tongue shot up right into his mouth.
"I knew you would come for me." said Basitla in a raspy voice.
"I thought I lost you." whimpered Revan.
"Malus... He's coming. We must go." told Bastila.
"Yes. We'll get back to Coruscant. I'll make sure you get back to perfect health." replied Revan.
"We don't have time to leave. He has an army here."
"Then I'll meet them head on." told Revan.
"No... I'll fight with you." told Bastila.
"Look at yourself. You're in no condition to fight."
"I will fight with you. And for you. To whatever end." replied Bastila.
Revan sighed, reached into his cloak and pulled out one of his lightsabers and gave it to Bastila. Bastila took the saber and took a deep breath as well. Revan and Bastila quietly began to make their way out of the refinery.
Just coming out from hyperspase was Carth Onasi and Jaden Page, leading the newfound army to meet with Revan. "Okay blockade the planet." ordered Carth. The Republicans, the TSF forces and the Onderon Military formed a blockade around Mustafar. "Canderous, lead your men down there and raid the facility."
"With pleasure." replied Canderous.
"Zaalbar, you can go with them." told Carth.
"Yes sir." growled Zaalbar.
The Sith sent space ships to puncture the blocade so some could escape. They had little success.
Back on Mustafar, Revan continued to lead Bastila back to the Ebon Hawk, until their presence was detected. A small platoon of Sith caught up to them. Revan and Bastila ignited their Sabers and killed them all. "You know, every time I see, your battle skills get better." said Revan trying to keep Bastila's mind off of Malus' torture.
Revan led Bastila back to the Ebon Hawk. They were just about to get aboard, until they heard someone shout "Don't go anywhere Revan." that man was Calo.
"Why won't you die?" asked Revan.
"I'm gonna enjoy this."
"Your going to enjoy it on me." told a Mandalorian "Go, Go, get her out of here.
Revan took Bastila aboard the Ebon Hawk and fired her up. Canderous on the other hand had some old battles that needed winning. "So, Canderous. You're a Mandalore now." observed Calo.
"You could never beat me, you runt of a gikza. I'll make sure you don't multiply here." Canderous unsucessfully intimidated.
"Nice try." said Calo drawing his blasters. Canderous immediately raised his repeater and fired a flurry at him. Canderous walked over his burned body and kicked it into the lava.
Hours later, the battle was over. Revan told Carth that the rescue mission was a success. And that he was happy to see his old friend again, and how fast his padawans grew. Carth told Revan that two ships breached the blockade and that it might be Malus. Revan ordered them to return home, for everyone had a tough day.
Good Chapter, but I thought it was quite fast.
Yeah, liked it, although, the battle scenes were a bit fast.
Revan spent all of his time with Bastila the rescue misson on Mustafar. He wouldn't leave her alone, which started to irriate her a little bit. "We're on Coruscant, Revan. You don't have to watch over me every now and then." she told.
"Well I'm sorry for being protective." repleid Revan with a laugh.
"I already forgave you for that. You still have my love." reminded Bastila.
Revan notice Bastila working on a new lightsaber "I take it that Malus destroyed your other one."
"He did, I'm almost done this one." she said "I think that I've slowly began to follow you footsteps. I am walking your path as a Jedi Guardian."
"Well I did see improvement in your combat on Mustafar."
Bastila got up and ignited her new saber. Revan looked in awe to see her wife's talent. A bright Cyan light shone in their faces. Bastila turned it off and put it away. "Great work, my love." Revan complimented.
"Thank you." she replied.
Revan left to the council chamber to find Carth and Jaden staring out the window to the new army. "I have to admit, without your help, Bastila and I wouldn'tve walked out alive." Revan admitted "We emerged victorious."
"Malus lives." told Vandar walking in "Far from over this is. Begun the Second Sith War Has."
Malus fled to Korriban and was greeted by the overseer there. "Malus. Why is Plagueis not with you?" he asked.
"The coward fled in fear." Malus replied "When I said I'd kill him, I meant it."
"Well why are you here, my lord?" the overseer asked.
"I am here for the relics of old." told Malus.
"Ressurection in order?"
"We have begun a war and lost the first battle. I'm going to need liutenents."
"Yes master, I'll retrieve it now."
The overseer ran to the relic vault to grab the Sith relics. He immediatly ran back to them right to Malus. Malus took Relics and looked at The Pike Of Luyoni Skywalker. First Dark Jedi and trainer of Marka Ragnos. "Good. He'll be the first." he said.
Malus walked over to the largest tomb on Korriban, for it was the tomb of Luyoni Skywalker. Malus entered the tomb and stuck the pike into the tomb's altar. "Sith of the old, Lord of Foundation. Live again, I command you." chanted Malus. There was a big energy blast that shot Malus back against the wall. Then, from the tomb, arised the Lord of Foundation. Revan's second ansector.
"Who disturbs my rest?" Luyoni asked.
"I have come to return your pike, so you are in complete rest." explained Malus.
"My pike. Give it to me." he demanded.
"Ah ah ah. First you must do something for me first."
"What is it?" Luyoni asked.
"Bow down to me and call me master. I will give your pike back, but you must serve me." ordered Malus.
Luyoni bowed "Yes... Master." he growled.
"Good, I'll live up to my end, now you must live up to your second part. Serve me in the war which has came." Malus gave Luyoni his pike and he followed Malus out of the tomb.
Malus walked onto the tomb of Ajunta Pall, The Lord of Dispair. bribing his sword in exchange for his service.
Malus then waked to the tomb of his grandfather: Marka Ragnos. The Lord of Power. "Grandfather. I have your scepter. Please take it, and please help me."
"Grandson. I'll help you. Who is your enemy in the war that has come?" Marka asked.
"Revan. He has followed the ways of the light. And has a large army behind him."
"So is this why you wish to ressurect the Sith lords?" asked Marka
"Yes. Help me, with your scepter."
"Okay."
Malus then waked to the tomb of Naga Sadow, The Desiple of Power. Giving him his lightsaber and poison blade. For his service.
His journey led him to the tomb of Tulak Hord, The Lord of Combat. Promises of power were his modivation.
Malus' last destination was the long lost tomb of Ludo Kressh, The True Disiple of Power, in the Shyrack Caves. Malus walked the paths of Jaden Page. And found the tomb of Sadow's successor. He was pretty hard to sway. Malus lied that he wouldn't have to work with Sadow. But every promise to them was broken when they reached the great temple. Malus had corrupted their minds and bound their powers to him. Malus was now nearly unstoppable. Malus laughed in his success.
Good Chapter, though it is short.
great story, hope to see alot more
Yeah, i liked it too, nice to see Marka deceive and corrupt those Siths. :D
It's Gan.. Marka is his grandfather.
"My liutenents. Take Freedon back from the realm of the damned. He shall join us." ordered Malus. Malus then turned to a fresh captive, her hands shackled, mouth gaged, eyes covered, and restricted from using the Force "Well, with you I won't get Revan, but I'll lure the pawns in. One by one."
Back on Coruscant, Revan had assembled a council meeting for discussion on a rescue mission. "We have sent one of us to examine the problems on Dxun, but that Jedi hasn't returned." explained Revan "It would take a shorter time to investgate on a moon so small. We need to send someone to do a rescue mission."
"But who?" asked Bastila.
"I'll go. And I'll take Mandalore with me." told Atton.
"All in favour?" asked Revan. Everyone else raised their hands. "Good. Atton will take Mandalore to go to Dxun to rescue Mira."
Canderous gathered his army and he was awaited by Atton on his stealthship: The Infiltrator. "Now don't get comfortable. This isn't a pleasure cruise."
"I don't think I've ever had a pleasure cruise in my whole pathetic life." replied Atton.
"Well as long as you know, then we won't have any problems. Muderer." taunted Canderous.
"Did that old bitch get to you? I admitted it to Jaden, so now it's over." Atton growled through his teeth.
"No, she didn't get to me." replied Canderous "But for someone so old, she packs a huge argument. I hate her as much as you do."
"A Jedi doen't hate, I just dislike her. Very, very, verrry... much." Atton BSed.
"It sounds to me that you hate her." observed Canderous.
"Well anyway, she's old news. She was killed by Jaden, then her ghost was cut off from the Force by Revan."
"Again, my old adverary shows more strength. Why did you join him in the first place?" asked Canderous.
"Nope! I don't think we're ready for that conversation, yet." told Atton.
"Okay. Then answer this: why did you volunteer for this mission?" Canderous asked again.
"Because I care for this woman. And we'll leave it at that."
"Fair enough."
The Infiltrator, reached Dxun, and landed in a jungle clearing right beside Mira's starfighter. Atton and Canderous led a small platoon of Mandalorian elites. Atton led the way. Following Mira's tracks through the Force, Atton was getting closer to Gan Ragnos. One who Atton hoped not to see. Atton followed the tunnels into the Sith field, the place where he led both Mira and Brianna. Atton navigated it well, for he remembered it well. Before Atton knew it, he was standing in front of the Tomb of Freedon Nadd: The Lord of Conquest, yet again.
"Master!" called Malus' new apprentice.
"What is it?" he asked.
"We have sensed a Force Adept. Coming our way."
"Excellent. Kill him." ordered Malus.
"But sir... It isn't Revan, we can break his will and bind him to you."
Malus used Force Choke on his new apprentice and brought him in closer "Do you dare question my orders?"
"N-n-n-no. Your w-w-word is the law."
"Now go kill him you incompetent gikza." ordered Malus as he threw him towards the door.
Atton, Canderous and his platoon navigated the tomb very carefully. They came across a rather large, rather locked door. Atton remembered the door. "There must be a way to open this." told Xarga.
"Of course there is. Split up." ordered Canderous.
"I'll see if there's a way to open it here." told Atton.
"Okay, let's move out."
Canderous and Xarga went in oppisite directions while Atton stayed at the door trying to find a means of unlocking it. "Mira, I'm coming." Atton said to himself. Atton couldn't find a means of opening it from there so he decided to do it the old fasioned way: Making one. Atton ignited his orange and yellow sabers and attempted to thrust them through the door. To his surprise, it worked. Atton made an opening to just fit everyone through without them getting stuck.
Canderous and Xarga came running back "Sir, we have found no means of opening it sir." reported Xarga. Xarga looked at the opening, then Atton turned to him. "Umm... nevermind."
"Yeah. Let's go." ordered Atton.
Atton, Canderous and his platoon continued to search for Mira in the tomb. They checked the prison cells, but only found her lightsaber. It was undamaged, which could definately work to his advantage. Atton then decided to continue down the path which led directly to the sarcophagus of Freedon Nadd. Atton began running towards the door until he sensed the presence of Sith Assassins lurking in the shadows. The door to the sarcophagus room began closing. "GO. FIND YOUR FRIEND." told Canderous.
Atton jumped through the door to be greeted by Malus' apprentice. "Malus has ordered me to kill you. But I say your will can be broken."
"I think you, schutta, should follow his order." taunted Atton.
"Back down."
"Deliver me Mira and I'll leave."
"I can't allow that. You'll have to die then."
"Oh no, you're scaring me. Before you're dead, what should I call you?"
"Sadow. Zenneth Sadow."
Zenneth ignited his doublesaber, while Atton ignited his. Both anticipated their moves well. Atton elbowed him in the stomach, and rolled over his back. Atton attemped to skew him from behind, but Zenneth hit the deck and used the Force to slide right under Atton. Zenneth attemped to skew Atton but Atton kicked his elbow. Zenneth started using his doublesaber as a windmill to repell Atton and possibly veer him to his master. Atton grew tired of it and raised Zenneth off the ground. Atton walked towards him and broke his saber. Atton then grabbed his neck "Where the hell is Mira?" asked Atton. Zenneth gagged "TALK! DAMN YOU!" Zenneth pointed towards the sarcophagus chamber and his foot started to twitch. "Thanks." said Atton, right before he punched him in the face, knocking him unconcious. Atton found Mira and dragged her out into the hallway. Atton pulled out the gag and Mira spit in his face. Atton gave out a little growl and pulled off the blindfolds. "Atton?"
"I try to rescue you and this is the thanks I get?" asked Atton wiping the spit off his face.
"I thoungt you were Malus." whimpered Mira.
"It's okay. I'm here now." told Atton unshackling Mira. Mira saw Malus following them. Mira pushed Atton out of the way but she got hit on the face with a rock Malus threw seconds before.
"Damn Sith. Don't you have any class?" asked Atton.
"You didn't show the same to that Jedi you *loved*." told Malus. Atton remembered the last Jedi he tortured before he left the Sith. The Jedi that showed him the Force. Atton took a deep breath and ignited his sabers. "I thought you were the one for talk, Rand." told Malus.
"Let's get this over with." demanded Atton. Malus ignited his doublesaber, but kept his cloak on. It covered his right arm. The arm that Revan took. Malus still fought like he did before. Even with only one saber. Atton fought well but Malus caught him off guard and svered his arm off. Atton lay on the ground in pain, trying not to show fear, he only grunted. Malus was then going to deliver the killing blow, but Mira stayed his hand. The sweat from Mira's hand when she was captive lost her grip. Malus almost killed Atton, if it werent for him rolling out of the way. Malus tried to slash or skew Atton but he kept on rolling. Mira caught eye of her saber, she pulled it out of Atton's jacket, ignited her viridian blade and had a brief fight with Malus. To everyone's surprise, The Mandalorians set off a permecrete and everyone flew at least ten metres. Malus got up to see no one there except for his apprentice.
"Master UGH... GHAAA." Malus killed Zenneth for his failiure.
Back on the infiltrator Mira saw to Atton, they had a lot to talk about. "Who sent you to come?" asked Mira.
"I volunteered." said Atton in a raspy voice.
"That doesn't sound like you."
"The reasone why, is because I care for you... I love you."
Mira shed a tear "You risked your life out of love?" she asked.
"I did. But it might not work between us."
"What?"
"A Jedi is too old for you."
"Jaden was one hundred years old at heart. That was the reason."
"So, what about us?"
"I think we hooked up a powe couplink."
Good Chapter. I like it when Atton says the same thing to Mandalore (Which he says to the Exile in TSL). Atton and Mandalore are still funny. Keep it up. Looking foward to more.
one thing I'm paticularly proud of is that I started an Atton/Mira romance
Good chapter, and i see you got barbecue sauce, whoops, sorry. I see you got them hooking up a power coupling, very nice.
And i see you did it well, congratulations. Also, i don't think Mira will kill Atton, if ya' know what i mean. ;) :xp:
Are you reffering to the part where Mira spits inhis face?
Are you reffering to the part where Mira spits inhis face?
Young love :lol:.
It is one year later, Revan was ready to call his wife a weapons master, Jaden and Visas got married and Mira and Atton have a working power couplink. Revan overlooked the academy, proud to see it's numbers have been growing quick. Bastila found Revan and greeted him, she put her forearm on his shoulder "How are you doing?" she asked.
"Fine, but not fine enough." answered Revan.
"How so?"
"Malus is still out there." he replied.
"I don't think that this is the time to talk about it, you have much to be proud of. I have one to be proud of." but Revan still had a vacant expression on his face "You're not fine are you?"
"No. I sence the dark side. It's stronger, but it's not here."
"Atton told us that Malus was ressurecting Freedon Nadd and many specters were there." explained Bastila.
"That's old news, but may be the reason why."
"He saw them in physical form, but very pale." she continued.
"Hmm, Wraiths of Darkness. There've been sightings of them for many years. Dead Sith Lords, ressurected. Bound to the will of Malus, or their *saviour*." explained Revan.
"No telling what Malus could do with them."
"That's what concerns me. For your safety."
Bastila closed her eyes. "I don't want you to risk your life for me."
"Hopefully I won't have to, but I will."
Bastila started crying. Revan hugged her and kissed her forehead.
At nighttime, the entire academy lay in their quarters, Revan had another vision. It was the same one he had for three years. Revan woke up. He put one of his sabers to his head and said to himself "Get out of my head damnit." Revan took a walk into the courtyard to clear his head. Revan stopped in his tracks and turned around.
"Well you certainly are a hard person to find Revan." said Luyoni Skywalker.
"Who are you?" he asked.
"Your darker ancestor, Luyoni."
"I take it your are a Wraith of Darkness." guessed Revan.
"You're correct."
"You were a fool to accept Malus' offer."
"With you gone, we'll finally rest in peace."
"He won't live up to it." told Revan.
"How so?"
"What do you expect? He want's power and he'll keep it."
"It's worth a shot. Time to die." told Luyoni as the rest of the Wraiths appeared. Ragnos, Hord, Kressh, Sadow, Pall, Nadd, even Nihilus and Malak.
All attacked him. Revan fought hard, he dodged everything he couldn't block, he fought swiftly. Bastila heard the metal clangs and saber clashes. She got up, and grabbed her saber. She joined the fight. Her new class worked for her well, she fought almost as good as Revan. Bastila and Revan struck down all the ghosts. Revan got ready to cut off their connection to the Force, but they dissapeared and fled. "It's not just your life in jeapordy anymore." told Bastila.
"We have to strike back." told Revan.
"The Second Sith War has indeed began." told Bastila.
(Bastila wasn't lying. In the next chapter the war begins.)
Yes the Second Sith War is here. Why didn't Malus take Sion? I like Sion better than Nihilus. Anyway sence is spelt sense. Other than that, everything is fine.
Sion went to the lightside to die.
Sion went to the lightside to die.
Damn, I forgot. Oh well. I'm looking foward to the next Chapter.
Yeah, Sion was redeemed. :xp: And looking forward for the war, after all, that is the name of the fic.
And looking forward for the war,
That's what we've been waiting for :xp:. A shame Brianna hasn't had a romance, but she can have Disciple or Carth.
In my opinion, Brianna should have a romance with The Disciple.
First I gotta know what the first battle should be. What planet should it be on? help me here.
I don't know. Your choice. I would either recommend Coruscant (But maybe you should save that for the last Planet) or start on Telos. How many Planets do you plan to do the Second Sith War on? Then I'll give you my choices.
probably 10 to 15
and where are we on your RP, I see that it gets very far when I'm sleeping.
It gets far when I'm sleeping too. Anyway there is a mini war starting on Kashyyyk. A shame about yours though. Is connor supposed to post?
Here's the Planets I reccomend. I would give reasons, but the last time I tried to post, it froze on me, because it was so long. So in order.
1. Telos
2. Mannan
3. Kamino
4. Mustafar
5. A Sith Ship
6. Dxun
7. Onderon
8. Dantooine
9. Korriban
10. Coruscant
Heres the war order:
1. Kamino
2. Manaan
3. Mustafar
4. Telos
5. Dxun
6. Onderon
7. Korriban
8. A Sith Ship
9. Dantooine
10. Coruscant
Thanks for the help Pottsie. Lets all get on our knees and give him a bow.
In the council chamber, the Jedi Council began to plan their next move. "We should conquer a world that would be vital to the Sith." suggested Brianna.
"I agree." replied Mical "A world of great value, lost to the Sith, should cripple their war effort."
"You are correct, Mical. There is a world in the wild space region that can clone living organisms. That's why the Sith have so many numbers." told Revan.
"I suggest we attack that planet." suggested Bastila.
"It is where the Sith are getting their army, Bastila. It will be heavily defended." told Jaden.
"Much must be risked in war." told Revan.
"Have you learned nothing?" asked Atris "That thought led you down the dark path in the first place."
"I'm willing to take chances, but I'll lead the front lines, so we lose less troops." replied Revan "I will go."
"No!"
"Brianna-"
"No, I'll lead a force to that planet, and conquer it."
"If that is what you wish, then yes. I will send Carth with you." told Revan.
Brianna Kae and Carth Onasi readied an army of wookies, mandalorians and a small force of Jedi to go to the planet of cloners. "I'm sending you the co-ordinates of where we have picked up major amounts of energy. It is most likely the planet." told Revan.
"Hopefully there won't be much bloodshed." replied Brianna.
Carth found Brianna, training to a droid, "Why do you fight?" he asked.
"So my reflexes and mind are ready."
"I have seen you fight in battle. I like the way you mash Jedi combat with your Echani ways. Who were your family?" asked Carth.
"My father was Yusanis, a great Echani warrior, my Mother, Arren Kae, a Jedi Knight and my sisters. But I'm alone in a family."
"I have a son, and had a wife."
"What happened to her?"
"After Revan was usurped of the Dark Lord, Malak attacked my homeworld. Killing my wife."
"That's aweful. What happened to your son before joining the order?"
"He believed that I didn't care, so he joined the Sith. Revan and I told him that his best friend got killed because she was hindering him."
"So he decided to join Revan?"
"Yes. As Malak told us, "He could always inspire loyalty"." remembered Carth.
The ships came out of hyperspace, Carth and Brianna leading the army got ready to fight. Carth looked around, and saw many familiar things. "This planet... I've been here before. This planet is where we grew our army and how Revan and Malak grew theirs."
"What?" asked Brianna.
"I was to lead it's defence, we were almost successful, but we fell back. I lost something." continued Carth. Carth could hear many screams, but not of the present. It was of eight years ago. The middle years of the Jedi Civil wars. "I... I... BRIANNA! LOOK OUT!"
The Sith began attacking, Brianna got hit by some blaster shots and fell off the edge. Carth attempted to grab her, but he missed. But still Brianna stopped falling. She levitated up to safety. "I lost the Force." Carth said to himself. When Carth pulled Brianna up, he found something below the railing. He grabbed it and it was a doublesaber with a blue blade. "This was mine." he said. Carth pulled Brianna to safety and gave her some medpacks. Brianna woke up and kissed him.
"You have my love." she said.
"I lost the Force." said Carth "And this" showing his lightsaber.
"I knew there was something special about you" told Brianna.
"Lets win this battle and take back Kamino."
"I will fight beside you."
Carth, fresh from his revelations and Brianna, led the Republic against the Sith and made them give up many platforms to keep from losing men. When they were cornered, they tried to evacuate who they could, but the ships were destroyed and the survivors were taken prisoner.
Back on the flagship, Brianna had a question to ask Carth. "So you were a Jedi?" she asked.
"Yes. I almost led the Republic to victory, but so much death caused me to lose my connection with the Force." answered Carth.
"Thank you... If it weren't for your revelation and valour, I would've drowned."
"Well- Hey-"
Brianna kept his mouth shut kissed him. Carth ran his hand through her now long white wavy hair.
(Kamino had been takem back, but the war is far from over. Manaan is next.)
I meant to keep the battles short because Carth's Revalations are the main part.
Yes all bow to me. Thanks Revanscool. Maybe the battles could be slightly longer, with everyone fighting.
Good chapter, liking Carth being once a Jedi.
And d'oh! I could have suggested a Brianna-Dustil romance! :xp:
I've just noticed the Carth-Brianna relationship. Man he is way too old for her. She could go with Dustil, like Jason said. Oh well, I'll like these twists.
Maybe she could meet Dustil in an interesting plot and they fight a bit but then Carth gives up, says he's too old and wishes him good luck with her.
Maybe she could meet Dustil in an interesting plot and they fight a bit but then Carth gives up, says he's too old and wishes him good luck with her.
It's all up to Revanscool.
Yeah its is fic after all. But we are the critic fans. :xp:
700!
Hey, what's wrong with an older guy and a younger gal? Some people prefer those with more 'life experience'. ;)
Hey, what's wrong with an older guy and a younger gal? Some people prefer those with more 'life experience'. ;)
Nothing, but it only gets wierd when a thirty-five year old marries a seventy year old (This actually happened on a TV Documentary).
No, 40-something with a 20-something atleast. :D
Hey, what's wrong with an older guy and a younger gal? Some people prefer those with more 'life experience'. ;)
Also think of the female Revan romance
Also think of the female Revan romance
That's different, Brianna is way younger than Female Revan at that time. :D
Anyways, any updates about the next chapter?
well I don't really see a problem with a 20 something year old going out with a 40 something year old. its a 20 something year old going out with a 60+ year old, that's a different story. And I'll try and get it soon.
"Revan?"
"Yes Carth."
"On Kamino. I had a revelation."
"Hmmm... Something's different about you."
"Uhh, yeah. I realized I was a Jedi but due to my loss of the Force, we lost Kamino."
"That's most surprising and fortunate news."
"I need help."
"I can train you to regain your connection to the Force."
"But... I am an Admiral."
"You must put that aside. Become who you were born as. Jedi, Carth Onasi."
"...Yes."
"Good. Your scars of war proves you're a Jedi Guardian, that is what you shall be."
"Should I call you master?"
"No. I am Revan, your friend."
"As you wish... my friend."
Mikel Kenobi frantically ran through the temple looking for Revan. When he found him, he had urgent news. "Master Skywalker, I have recieved a distress signal from Manaan."
"Manaan is the hands of healing to the Republic. It must be defended." replied Revan.
"Who shall go?" Mike asked.
"Bastila and I know the planet the most. We were forced to go there. We will go."
Revan went to find Bastila and tell her of Manaan. "Bastila. Manaan is under attack. We must go."
"If we should go, we should bring Mission and Zalbaar with us."
"That makes sense. But why would they attack Manaan?"
"Kolto. Manaan supplies kolto for the Republic." replied Revan.
"I see. Lets go now." she told.
Revan and Bastila prepared the wookies to go to Manaan. Aboard the flagship, Zalbaar and Mission were looking forward to talking with their old friend. "I didn't ask you to join the war, you two." reminded Revan.
"Rev, we joined because you're our friend. Friends have to stick together." told Mission.
"Your age has caught up with your personality. But I still remember what you look like." told Revan.
"Thank you." replied Mission stroking her hand down her lekku.
Revan turned to Zalbaar. "So what's your story?" he asked.
"Unfortunatly, my father has died in our war against the slavers. I took his place and drove them off." roared Zalbaar.
"I'm sorry about your father. He was an honourable being." replied Revan.
"I'm glad you didn't use the term 'Animal'." he growled.
"After having my experience with you, 'Animal' is the lowest term that would describe you." commented Revan "The wookies are a noble race. It was a privilage for you to swear me a lifedebt."
"Thank you."
"Malak was correct." told Bastila "You could inspire loyalty."
"I am proud of the fact I did it out of respect. Not out of intimidation."
"You inspired my loyalty... and love."
"The fact I am VERY proud of."
Out of hyperspace, came Revan's force. Revan could inspire much loyalty, for his force was bigger than the Sith's. "Their force is so small. I don't think Malus wants to take the planet." told Revan.
"If not the planet, then why did they come."
"The kolto. Manaan is the only planet that supplies kolto." told Mission.
"I don't think they want any, I think they want it poisoned." told Bastila.
"Then tell Zalbaar this: barricade Ahto City. Keep the Sith away from the water." ordered Revan.
"Yes sir." Mission ran off to tell Zalbaar Revan's orders. Meanwhile, Revan and Bastila flew down to land.
Revan and Bastila advanced deep into Ahto City, looking for the Sith. The Sith then ambushed on them, without warning. "Without warning?" asked Bastila.
"Well what did you expect? They're Sith." replied Revan. Revan and Bastila fought with the Sith that ambushed them and killed them one by one. The more experienced ones actually landed a saber clash. The most experienced one snuck behind Bastila and attempted to assassinate her. Revan used the Force to pull her towards him and save her. She kissed him on the cheek and Revan threw one of his sabers at the unfortunate Sith. "Do I always have to hold you by my side, wherever we go?" asked Revan.
"Don't know. But I'd like it." replied Bastila.
"So you try to get yourself killed on purpose?" joked Revan.
"NO!"
"Calm down, I was only joking. I'd love to rescue you every now and then."
"Sooo, you let me get kidnapped on purpose?" joked Bastila.
"Ah-hahaha. I think we're done here." chucked Revan.
"Then I suggest we move on."
Revan and Bastila moved deeper into Ahto City, to find the commander. By this time, Zalbaar had already stationed his wookies on the borders of the city. Zalbaar and Mission had to endure many attempts of kolto poisoning, but they were all unsuccessful. The wookies proved to be a fomidable opponent. Revan and Bastila reached centre city and found who was leading the Sith. It was his old friend Malak. "Malak... so you have fallen victim to Malus' lies?" asked Revan.
"I couldn't rest in peace. Knowing I can go to rest with revenge."
"I told you leader. You will remain a Wraith of Darkness. Malus will not hold his word."
"He told you 'It's worth a shot.' It is." Malak ignited his saber and attacked Revan. Malak was a lot stronger than Revan remembered. But Revan still blocked what was offered. Malak even attempted to kill Bastila at sometimes, but Revan was always there. "I should've seen this years ago. You would break you body for this woman." told Malak.
"And you would do well to keep away from her."
"Then again. I was always the ignorant one." Malak attempted to kill Bastila again, but Revan began cutting him off from the Force. Malak was smart enough to dissapear and let Revan win. Revan and Bastila killed the Sith who would not admit defeat. Manaan had been saved.
Carth a Jedi. I always imagined him to be a Jedi Guardian. Good Chapter and I'm looking foward to more.
These two mini-wars look more like a simple battle. :lol: But it's still cool, i like it.