*Many hours later. The car pulls up at the North Pole*

Syrnl: Oh...I only had three tracks to go! Oh well

Deac: To the Workshop!

*Meanwhile Flax and Sophae are stuck on the M25.*

*The LP of Bat Out Of Hell is playing you the umptieth time.*

Flax: Hay, I didn't have enough money for two tapes

*Ejects the tape.*

Flax: See if you can get any good stations.

Sophae: Anything's better than your taste in music.

*SCAN finds Radio 1.*

Flax: Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

*RH Irvine walks out of the car, dazed and confused. Drool hanging form his lower lip, and looking quite zombified.* ((:D))

*Outside stood a few ice statues, standing approx 3 stores tall, of the likeness of those behind the incident.*

*Deac barges straight into the workshop and runs over to Santa*

Deac: You're real!

Father Christmas: Of course I am. I just have every parent tell their children I don't exist so I don't get found out. But Lokpihet's been planning this for a long time. He gloated, and told me that he formed Lokpicorp to dominate the toy market and put me out of business!

Syrnl: The fiend! I'm so proud!

Rwos: Syrnl! Aren't you supposed to be good? Where is Lokpihet, anyway?

Gilian: Oh, look, it's Santa! *She walks over and slaps him* That was for all the presents you never gave me when I was growing up! Creep.

Father Christmas: Look, I can only handle one planet. If I didn't get to you, blame your regional child gift giving personification. Now untie me!

*Deac does so*

Deac: So where are they?

*Reletha appears in a large robotic animal, whilst Lokpihet appears wearing a suit and sunglasses*

Lokpihet: Right. Deac, you will fight me whilst spoofing the Matrix, MR Starkiller...

Reletha: And Orthos, you will fight me in the style of popular Japanese animation! *Lines start coming off Reletha*

Syrnl: Spoofs...gotta love em!

*In Fused Irvine*

Fused Irvine "Um, yeah, I guess the rest of you can fight me in...."

*Fused Irvine sees Deac and Lokpihet Kung Fu fighting, and Reletha and Orthos yelling ans screaming at eather other in attempt to get more powerful.*

((Sry thought it might be funny))

Fused Irvine "DAMNIT! Why are all the good stuff already taken? Oooh! I know!!!"

*The view of the rest of the characters swurls and ends up in an altered form of the current reality, the world seems like a huge block with pixelated backgrounds. The Characters are remodeled in a low polycounted sprites. All at the same time a sort of suspenceful music can be heard from all around, seemingly coming from no where.*

*The characters are lined up, with Fused Irvine facing them, none to move until their designated times.*

RH Irvine "What the hell!?"

^__^ (http://members.aol.com/Parappa125/ff7bat.mid)

*Lokpihet eventually falls, and Reletha is topped by Orthos' Kumehumeha*

Deac: Now surrender Father Christmas! And Dick Clark!

*Suddenly Flax swings from the rafters, by a bull whip no less, and topples Fused Ivrine "Raiders" plays in the background.*

Flax: Spoof something entertaining!

*Flax reaches for his gun, only to find it missing.*

Fused Irvine "Look, if I was a spikey blonde haired freak, I'd so Omislash you right now... But in complete fairness, if we were to spoof something."

*Fused Irvine takes out a ring, and wears it on his left hand. Then taking his right hand, and warping it around his left fist. Lowering his hands somewhere below his wiast, the ring immits a lightsaber beam roughly three and a half feet long.* ((XD))

Syrnl: And if I had a large gun on my arm I'd feel inclined to use something called Big Shot on you. Don't know where that came from!

Father Christmas: I'm free!

Flax: Fine!

*Pulls out his own ring and zaps Fused Ivrine in the unmentionables.*

*Fused irvine falls over*

Gilian: Oh come on. Spoof something anime, so I can play the part of the rabid fangirl and slash everyone in the room.

Rwos: Santa's free! Uh, what now?

Gilian: Rwos, you can spoof a big prehistoric bird. After all, you've got a beak, claws, and no feathers...

RH Irvine "Why don't you just go fall into a well..."

((Points at sig))

Deac: No more time for spoofs!

*Frees Dick Clark.*

Deac: Right, our work here is done

*Lokpihet's cellphone rings again. When he tries to answer it it opens a portal, sucking our heroes back to the Cantina*

Syrnl: That was fun!

Orthos: Hey! A tree! With Presents...

Deac: Well, what have we learnt? That kidnapping celebrities ultimately fails? That 90% of phones are not properly used, often with disasterous results? That music does really pass the time?
Or that Christmas might be about more than presents and money.

*The Darkstars open their presents*

Orthos: "Dismembered Ewoks Greatest Hits" .Great

Deac: Cool! A new arm attachment for all my kitchen needs!

MERRY CHRISTMAS FROM THE CANTINA.

The End...






Until Next YEAR.....