Yes, it's here! The not-so-highly anticipated sequal to Never Trust a Hutt! You can all do your happy dances now! :cowdance :3pdance: :cowdance
Ok, on a more serious note, this one is set 3 years after the First one, as the story will later tell. And, this story should have way better spelling since I am using word now.
Enjoy!
I'm looking foward to it.
Travels of Kavar Part 2
Darkness over Coruscant
The Republic starship Monolith flashed out of hyperspace, dancing amongst the stars as it prepared for war. The crew of the Monolith had no idea that the fighting would come to them.
Commander Beruun studied the starscape outside the window. The bridge of the ship had the best view on the ship, and sometimes he would come here just to gaze out at the endless space that unfolded before him. He turned around, pacing the large bridge impatiently. "Has the supply frigate arrived yet?" he asked the Republic officer currently at the navigation controls.
The officer looked at the monitor, then answered, "Yes, sir, they've finally arrived, we're docking with them now."
Beruun chuckled. "Those Mandalorians won't know what hit them! Bring it in to dock and start unloading that cargo! I wonder what took them so long, anyway?"
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Beruun soon found out.
Only a few minutes later, all Republic troops on the ship were dead.
Instead Sith troopers walked the Monolith. They were the new owners of the warship.
Two men walked along the Monolith's hallways, now littered with dead bodies. One was a Sith officer. The other was a tall figure, clad in dark robes, that hid most of his face. The officer made his report. "Sir, all Republic troops have been killed. The ship is ours. Hiding our troopers inside the supply frigate worked perfectly."
The robed figure smiled. "Good. Tell our men to set a course for Coruscant. I have business there."
The Officer bowed. "As you wish, Lord Xyrus."
Great introduction Chapter Jabba.
:)
Sorry if it was a bit confusing. It was a really hard chapter to write.
Chapter 2
Coruscant. A city. And a planet. It's towering buildings shot into the sky, engulfing the entire planet in sparkling light.
So much importance lay in this world. The capitol of the Republic. The location of the Jedi Council. It was the center of the universe. And a place safe from all dangers. Or so it seemed. For the Republic would soon face a new threat. A strike at it's heart. At Coruscant itself.
Amongst the endless buildings of the planet lay the Jedi Temple. Inside, no one had any idea of the darkness descending upon Coruscant as they spoke.
Master Kavar stared out the window of this ancient temple. He had aged three years since his first assignment, and a new lightsaber hung from his belt. A memory of his past. Of a Sith he had met. Fitting it with a blue lightsaber crystal, Kavar had learned to use it well, finding that he liked the two lightsaber style. Now when ever his long blue lightsaber flashed, his new short one flashed as well.
Another Jedi, Zez-Kai Ell, approached him, disrupting his view of the city outside. "I am sorry to disturb you, Kavar, but the council has a new need of you."
Kavar studied Zez-Kai Ell's face. "I hope you bring good news, but I can tell by the look on your face that it is bad. Tell me, and I will do as the council wishes."
"It is dark news indeed. Across the planet, Republic ships have been showing up, making an excuse for needing to dock. Then, everybody abandons ship, I'm not sure where they disappear to. It happened again this morning. A ship called the Monolith, that was supposed to be going off to war with the Mandalorians. Showed up, made an excuse as to why it needed to land, and the ship was empty by the time anyone got down to meet the crew." The Jedi stopped, nodding at Kavar. "You have always been good at these things. See if you can find out what's going on. If you do, report to the council."
Kavar nodded. "I will do as you ask. I will depart right away."
And with that Kavar walked off down the long halls of the Jedi Temple. He had no idea of the darkness that lay ahead of him.
I wonder what's bad. Anyway good Chapter. Liked the descriptions.
Chapter 3
Looking at the surface of Coruscant, it would look like the perfect place to live. But in the lower levels, beneath the miles and miles of metal towers, it was like a different world. No real sunlight reached down hear. it was lit by florescent signs, and the lights of the windows high above. And it was hear that the planet's scum came to live. Gangsters, criminals, bounty hunters. The ground level of Coruscant was a dangerous place. People could disappear here and never be missed. Or gather here, and never be noticed.
On the bustling streets of the undercity, two men approached each other. Nodding, they crossed the street, entering a small alleyway occupied only by junk, and lit only by a brightly flashing advertisement. Then, one of them spoke. "My ship just arrived. I was told to meet you. Where are we gathering?"
The other man made a movement with his hand, signaling for the man to be more quiet. Then he whispered an answer. "No where. It would draw to much attention. Tell your men to stay where they are. We'll communicate by comm link. Soon our Lord will give us the signal. Then you just make sure to do your job."
The first man glanced around. "I thought I heard somebody for a second there. Must have been some trash getting blown around. Anyway, I've got it. Stick to the shadows, don’t draw attention, wait for the signal. I'll go report back to my men. The Sith will rule Coruscant someday, I swear it!"
"Let us hope so. But we have talked for too long already. Get back to your camp." And the two men departed, going opposite ways.
When he was sure they were gone, Kavar rose from the shadows of his hiding place, only a few feet from where the men had stood moments before. The Sith were on Coruscant. There was no time to lose. Kavar took off in silent pursuit of the first Sith officer. It was time to find out what was going on here.
Another good Chapter. One again, I loved the description.
"Never Trust a Hutt" had lots of action every chapter. In this one, I am trying to slow down a bit, and make it a slower, more suspenceful story. Don't worry though, there will be action by the end.
Chapter 4
For the fourth time in the past minute, the Sith officer glanced over his shoulder. Once again, he could have sworn he was being followed. But just like every other time, the street was empty. Empty of all but the litter of broken lives. Years ago this area had been one of the most highly populated sectors in the refugee sector. Then the gang wars had started. No one lived here anymore. The sector lay as a tribute to violence. A reminder of the lives that were shattered. It was devoid of all life. Or at least it was. Until yesterday.
Sith officer Tren stopped for a moment, fighting down panic. Gazing into the distance, he could see it now. The camp. He started off again, a little faster than a walk, hoping that who ever it was behind him would give up and turn back. The person behind him didn't turn back. Tren heard it again. Footsteps behind. Then it stopped. Tren turned, and listened. Maybe his pursuer had given up. The Sith officer turned back, only to find a lightsaber at his throat.
"Tell me, what is that camp over there?", Kavar asked. After following this man across the lower levels of Coruscant, he was glad to be able to actually catch his prey.
Tren had a decision to make. He could chose loyalty and die, or self preservation and live. He chose to live. "What would you like to know sir? Um, I mean, well, its a Sith camp. Many Sith are gathered there. We're planning for our attack, sir. Um what else would you like to know. I'm sure I could be useful. Please don't kill me, I'll tell you all you won’t to know," Tren said in about five seconds flat, words flowing out of him at the speed of hyperspace.
Kavar smiled. "Slow down a little. I won't kill you. Now tell me again. It's a Sith camp, huh? What do you do here, what are you planning?"
Tren took a deep breath, trying to slow down. It didn't work. "We're planning for the big assault sir. First we plan to-" that was as far as Tren ever got as he was suddenly taken down by a sniper shot. He was dead in less than a second.
Kavar twirled around, only to find himself looking at nearly every occupant of the Sith camp, guns ready, charging at the lone Jedi.
Enough sneaking around. thought Kavar. At least I can be loud as I fight for my life.
Kavar swung his lightsaber, blocking the first two blaster bolts. Then he took a step back, sizing up the opponents. There were a lot of them. Over two hundred by the look of it. Kavar knew he couldn't win. But he could try. Kavar charged, using the force to give him speed.
It was time for Kavar to fight for his life.
Interesting story, but I see that you have the same problem I had with my first fic - the chapters aren't very long. Try to add more dialogue and try to describe how the characters felt when they spoke certain words, anyway add as much description as you can, those are the few advices that helped me a lot and I think they can help you too.
Thanks, igyman, I'll try to add more dialogue and description, so I don't have such super-short chapters. It's weird, sometimes It seems longer as I'm writing it then I post it and realize how short it is.
Anyway, have you read my other fic, because this is a sequal to that one. The first one is posted in the Jedi archives and called "Never Trust a Hutt" if you want to read it.
I didn't have the time lately, but I'll definitely check it out. ~snipped~ Sorry, igy, a person can advertise their fic in their own sig or thread, but not in other people's threads.--Jae
I love what I'm reading so far jabba. The chapters are short, but they're to the point and they are telling your story well.
@ Athos: Thanks, Im sorry about the short chapters, they should get longer.
@ Igyman: Ill be sure to check out your fics when I have time. (Which should be soon, I dont have much to do during the summer)
Chapter 5
There is a certain time when there is nothing to do but fight. To turn and face the evils of the world and see if you can at least take down some of them with you. To give up trying to survive and meet evil head on. Kavar was at that moment now. He could not win this battle. But he could fight his hardest. He could take some of these Sith down with him. He could weaken this threat to Coruscant. He could help the Jedi even with his dying breath. And so Kavar charged.
However, Kavar was not alone as he had thought. Hope remained still. For even as he tore through the first of the Sith soldiers, a friend was on his way.
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Hundreds of miles away, in the Jedi temple, Zez-Kai Ell opened his eyes. Without a word he dashed down the steps from the meditation room, running across white stone hallways, dashing past statues of revered Jed Knights. Finaly, he arrived at a room filled with Jedi. Panting and out of breath, he somehow managed to yell loud enough for the whole room to hear. "Kavar is in danger, I have sensed it! Prepare a few Jedi, and get a shuttle ready to go down to the lower levels!" then, softly, amid the noise and confision that followed, Zez-Kai Ell muttered "There is little hope for Kavar. But maybe we can figure out what this new threat is."
Minutes later a team of twenty Jedi was assembled in the large halls of the Jedi temple docking bay. One by one, they boarded the orbital shuttle, preparing for anything that may face them in the next few hours. Among them was Zez-Kai Ell. A freind of Kavar's, he was very silent as he walked up the ramp and into the shuttle. He spoke to the Jedi beside him as the shuttle took off and rocketed through the nighttime skies of Coruscant. "I keep telling myself that Kavar is alive. But I know that he will not survive long enough for help to arrive. Much danger he was in. There isn't any hope for his survival."
"There is always hope." the Jedi answered. He was a green Twi'lek, Jorula by name. "Kavar is a recourcfull young Jedi. Perhaps you are right. Perhaps there is no hope. But in his death he becomes one with the force. That is something to be glad of."
Zez-Kai Ell did not feel at all happy. He could not see happiness in this situation. Perhaps when he was older like Master Jorula he would understand better. For now he was content to hope for Kavar's survival, a false hope it may be.
The pilots voice came from the front of the shuttle. "We're comming in for landing, I think I've found what we're looking for. Some sort of fight going on down there."
The Jedi leaned out the window. And saw what they had thought impossible. Kavar still lived, and still stood fighting. Almost half an hour had past, and yet the young guardians lightsaber still flashed, and fifty men lay dead by his blade. Jorula's words echoed in Zez-Kai Ell's skull as the shuttle landed in the middle of the ongoing battle. There is always hope.
The door of the shuttle opened. Twenty lightsabers ignited. And twenty Jedi charged. Kavar froze in shock as blue, green, and yellow lightsabers flashed around him, cutting down all in their path. Somehow, he would live to see another day. He whooped out loud.
The following battle was breif but brutal fighting. Jorula, a master of lightsaber combat, twirled his green blade as he cut down three Sith troopers at once, slicing another across the chest. Confused, the Sith tried to regroup, and sent a barage of baster fire at the new Jedi threat. They were soon silenced as the Jedi charged again, killing all in seconds. Those who didn't die retreated. The battle was won.
Kavar rejoined the Jedi, laughing, happy to be alive. The Jedi boarded the shuttle, and headed back to the temple. The new threat had been revealed. Dark days lay ahead for Coruscant. But for now, the Jedi had the upper hand.
Friend is spelled wrong. Anyway good Chapter. Why does the Force tell me this Fic is almost over?
Much better. The length is improving, keep it up.
Why does the Force tell me this Fic is almost over?
The force must be lying. This fic has a lot more chapters to go before it is over.
:)
Chapter 6
In the darkness a Sith Lord plotted.
He plotted about the death of the Jedi. Of how they would soon fall into darkness. About the downfall of Coruscant. The fall of the republic. About the power he would gain. About all that he would lose if he failed. He thought about Kavar, the young Jedi Knight. The man who had defeated one of his divisions. And the man who had earlier helped to save his life. The man who he had betrayed, and tried to kill. The man that nearly succeeded in killing the Sith Lord. Kavar was dangerous.
Most of all though, he thought about fear. The fear that gripped him. Ran through him even now. Fear of failing. Fear of the punishment that would follow. Fear of Kavar. Sith Lords were not supposed to have fear. But this Sith, the dark lord Xyrus, had many fears indeed. And it had been tearing him apart inside for three years.
Lord Xyrus arose, bringing his eyes back into focus. Not that it did much good. The room was completely dark, lit only by the open doorway at the end of the long hall. The Sith Lord reached out with the force, switching the lights on to illuminate his temporary refuge. The room was huge, made of ancient brown rock, with pillars of stone that rose forty feet into the air before joining the enormous ceiling. At the center of the throne room lay an ancient statue of a Sith lord, surrounded by a pool of water. This ancient palace had once been used by a user of the dark side, until it had been forgotten years ago.
Walking across the room, and into a dimly lit stone passageway. While proceeding through the halls, he attempted a smile, but failed horribly. Once again the fear of death ran through him. What if he was forced to fight Kavar in battle? Kavar was too dangerous.
A sudden voice awoke Xyrus from his thoughts, bringing the Sith to realize that he had traveled slightly to far. "My Lord, is it time yet?" said the Sith general, his voice echoing through the ancient temple.
Xyrus hesitated for a moment. "Yes," he answered, with a slight hesitant pause between each word. "It is time. Prepare the men. Send the first assassin. Our very best. You know the target."
A sign of obvious pleasure filled the officer's face as he replied "Yes sir, Coruscant will be ours at last! Anything else sir?"
Xyrus was about to answer no, then reconsidered. "Only one thing. If that Jedi called Kavar tries to intervene, don't harm him. Avoid him at all costs if you can, but don't attack him again."
Because Kavar was too dangerous. He was more dangerous to Xyrus than he could ever imagine.
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P.S.- Sorry this chapter took so long, I bet you all thought I had given up this fic.
Nice chapter. Short, but nice. I like the villain's name - Xyrus.
A few spelling corrections though, I hope you don't mind:
assassin, not assasin;
too far, not to far;
hesitant, not hasitant;
And a few more pointers, in hope they'll help you improve your fic: the Force and Dark/Light Side, is usually spelled with capital first letters.
~snipped~ Please, no review requests in other threads per forum rules. (
http://www.lucasforums.com/showthread.php?t=151030) Thanks, Jae.
Thanks, and by the way, I did read your first fic, and it was very good, now to read the second one.
Chapter 7
The sunset gleamed, sending shards of golden light over Coruscant's placid surface. The day was almost at an end. And soon would come the darkness. In more than just one way.
As the sun's last rays played across the Jedi council room, Kavar made his report. Tired from the day, he struggled to remain upright as he described what he had found. "As you have seen, the Sith are on Coruscant. How many, I do not know. However, I do not believe that the Sith we defeated today were the last of them. Where the others are remains to be seen."
Master Jorula looked up, with a troubled expression on his face. "How did we not sence this? The Sith on Coruscant? We should have sensed it immediately. But I feel that nothing is out there. Perhaps you are mistaken, Kavar. Perhaps the Sith we encountered was all that there was."
Zez-Kai Ell thought for a moment before questioning "But what about all of the Republic warships? They should have been off fighting with the Mandalorians. But instead they came back and abandoned ship. There was a lot more than only 200 men on those ships. In fact, the Sith we found were probably the crew of only one of them. Nothing here adds up. They must be here, but yet we cannot sense them"
A Jedi knight seated to Zez Kai-Ell's right, a young woman named Atris spoke up. "I do not know about this new threat of Kavar's. If they were here we would have felt it allready. What sort of power could mask an entire army hiding on Coruscant? Maybe we should simply wait and see."
"We must always keep an open mind." Kavar said, walking to the center of the room, "But you are right, Atris. We should wait for this new enemy to reveal itself. I only hope it will not be to late."
Jorula looked around the room at the faces of the other Jedi. "It is settled then. For now, we will wait. Soon this enemy will reveal itself. And when it does, we will be ready. Ready for whatever awaits us."
But even as Jorula finished his sentance, the Jedi found what they were waiting for. In the worst possible way. The door flew open and a Republic messanger ran in, panting and out of breath. An expression of shockplayed across his face as he delivered his message. "Jedi, you must come quickly! The supreme chanceller has been assassinated!"
The Jedi stared at the officer in shock for a moment. And as they filed out of the room, the sun gave its final flicker and dissapeared comletely behind the tall towers in the distance. The darkness over Coruscant had begun.
Good Chapter. It's been a while.
Yeah, it has. Sorry, ive just had to much to do lately.
The chapters are still a bit short, but the important thing is that they are also very interesting. Keep it up.